We’re coming towards the end of the book, but it isn’t too late to order it for yourself. As you can see, I cannot recommend
‘s book highly enough. And while you’re at it, head over to The Blue Room for her regular writings and give her a subscribe!When we’re in the midst of deep adversity, or even just an unexpected detour, what do we do? Do we fixate on the pain and negativity until that’s all we can see? Do we fret over external factors beyond our control? Or do we turn inward, breathe deeply, and focus on what we can change—namely, our own response?…To focus on the pain to the exclusion of all else is beginner’s mind; we will burn to a crisp. (I must also check myself, as a White person of privilege, not to insulate myself from the pain that afflicts others as a matter of course.)1
Our youngest child received an award at the end of their senior year from the high school science department. To each of the students who received this award, they received a really beautiful and unique gift - a Galilean thermometer. It was such a cool gift to receive and I’m selfishly thankful that it will not be going to college with them but instead sitting in our back windows telling the temperature. The principle behind it is simple - the density of a liquid changes in proportion to its temperature. So depending on which sealed colored glass has risen to the top, you get an estimate of the current temperature. So not only is it a wonderful science tool but it is absolutely beautiful. So in this case, different colored balls rise to the top depending on the temperature around the thermometer. They do this just naturally.
But what about in our lives? What if we thought of our lives like one of these beautiful thermometers? What rises to the top? In one sense, there are things that rise up whether we want them to or not. Circumstances of life do come into our lives often regardless of the choices that we make. These can be on the spectrum of good to not-so-good - they just come into our lives. There are other things that come into our lives (again, good to not-so spectrum) that come about due to the choices that we make. So those are in the cylinder. But there are still others present of the responses that we have that can affect all of these.
For me, one of the things that floats up is gratitude. I don’t know who initially encouraged me towards it, but at least 8 or 9 years ago, I started recording my gratitudes daily before I go to bed. I use my favorite journaling app, DayOne, for this and I make myself list at least 3 things from the day (and sometimes I put moments in during the day lest I forget) for which I’m grateful. Some of them are simple, some are deep, some are funny, some are weird. But they’re all gratitude. And over the years, these have developed into a gratitude muscle that shapes the way that I engage the world and how I engage all the other things floating around in my life. So even if things float to the top that are toward the not-so-good part of the spectrum, I also know that those are present alongside the gratitudes that I look for each day.
To go back to something MaryAnn shared in a pervious chapter, this practice for me doesn’t make life easier, but it has made me stronger and resilient. So, if you haven’t done it, try a gratitude practice that works for you...Maybe even drop a gratitude or two in the comments!
Grace, Peace, Love, and Joy,
Ed
McKibben Dana, MaryAnn. Hope: A User's Manual (p. 147). Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co.. Kindle Edition.
That was a really good devotion for me Ed. Gratefulness comes to me when times are hard or difficult and then afterwards, I realize what I have to be grateful for. Im in a 12 step fellowship and listing things that were grateful for is one of the number one priorities that we have next to staying clean and sober.
I got diagnosed with shingles February 23 2024 and to this date I still take medication still to improve my site. I’m grateful for my eye doctor and that he caught the virus at the early stages. I may have to take medication the rest of my life, but at least I have my sight. I’m a truck driver and that would be really hard to only have one eye to do my job. I have to find at least one thing that I’m grateful for every day. I’m grateful that God loves me and has a plan for me and is doing miracles in and through-out my life every day.
Thank you, Ed for listening and others for reading, Mark
I’ve always had a curiosity for these thermometers—thanks for explaining the basic premise. I’ve accepted that I just like the colors and liquid in combination. I have learned that traumas, despite “my”best efforts to work through and release them, can bubble up in my life in very inopportune moments. Although it’s been an active process since my body first “tapped out” at age 17 with pseudo-seizures—it has been an active process of looking at thoughts and feelings that were tightly contained and “never to be discussed aloud.” Too much wreckage would have occurred for the people I loved and depended on. I took “pride” in my ability to “forgive the unspeakable acts and ideas that were imposed upon the me as a young child.” I thought I had “built a bridge and gotten over it.” WRONG! The Body DOES Keep the Score as Besser VanderKolk has written about. What I WANT to bubble up in my life is the gifts of the Spirit. And often, they do. And I’m grateful. Gratitudes come easy to me, as I’ve practiced finding gratitudes throughout my day for years now. But those traumas? They bubble up at the most inopportune times, it seems! They co- exist alongside the beautiful “things” in my life. And tho I would prefer that they did not exist at all, I have learned to accept them as a part of my story. Not exactly to befriend them, but I do respect the power they contain. And I am able to co-exist with them. I no longer fear them. I am able to recognize them as they nudge me and say “pay attention to ME!” If I don’t pay attention, they will seep into my life in other ways and DEMAND attention. I attend a trauma informed writing group weekly—with a group of survivors who can talk about hard things without clearing the room. We write to a prompt for 5 minutes, an other prompt for 10 minutes, and the final prompt for 20. We may or may not share aloud. This is my bridge to healing and life after two years of weekly therapy from 2021 until 2023. Exhale. Acknowledging my own shadows has been laborious and intense at times since I was that 17 year old girl—after all, I’m approaching 67!! And HOPE still exits—within my heart and soul. And I am grateful.